My baby is already three weeks old one week away from being a month old. I can’t grasp that that much time has passed already. Beatrice is already holding her head up for seconds at a time and making new discoveries every day. She loves feeling soft things like her bear and tummy time. I had her pictures taken this week. Which she really didn’t care for. We were able to get one good picture of her though which was nice since most of them looked like this


Bea also got to meet my friend Morgan’s niece Raelyn who’s four months older than her they were pretty intrigued by one another.

Here’s the one good picture Morgan was able to get of my little rugrat. I still have a voucher my in laws to be bought me for more photos so maybe I’ll have better luck then.



Beatrice is two weeks old tomorrow

This last week has been completely crazy. I finally got to bring Beatrice home at the beginning of this week and I’m not going to lie it’s been tough. Don’t get me wrong I didn’t expect it to be easy and all things considered she is an easy going baby. I literally slept through all of last night except for when I had to wake up to nurse her.

I also didn’t expect to feel so overwhelmed those first couple of days. When people tell you to ask for help when you need it when you bring the baby home you should really. The first day I was sure I would be able to do everything on my own without Brandon or anyone else’s help by the second day I was asking pretty much anyone who had ever offered me help to help. Brandon has been great with cooking and soothing little Bea when I can’t. I definitely think she’s a daddy’s girl. Even when he’s not doing anything if he’s in eye sight she always gives him this look of awe. Brandon’s grandparents have been great too they were able to take me to her first appointment which went well I’m finally liking this pediatrician he wasn’t my first choice, but he handles Beatrice well and seems to know what he’s talking about. Which is better than most doctors I’m finding out here. Brandon’s grandparents paid for some professional pictures to be taken of Bea and one of my best work friends who also made me some frozen meals is a photographer who’s taking some pictures of her own. Of course I also can’t forget Ashley one of my closest friends to the point of being like a sister to me who has gone out of her way for Beatrice and I a couple of times now and is always willing to help. I’m so blessed to have so many great people in my life willing to help me because honestly raising a child takes a village sometimes more than one even. Beatrice is so very loved and I think she feels it already that’s why she’s such an easy baby.

I had things down pretty well by the third day. I gave her a sponge bath and we started a sleep schedule sort of thing. I also gave up on my idea that she had to sleep in her crib every time she sleeps. Don’t get me wrong for naps and such during the day I have no problem with putting her in there, but at night time I just can’t sleep with her way on the other side of the room it gives me anxiety about missing feedings or not hearing her when she cries or the worst case scenario of SIDS even though I know that co-sleeping is not suppose to be safe it feels safe to me to have her right there next to me to nurse and check on. I always make sure that there aren’t any pillows, blankets, or anything that might be dangerous for her when we go to bed.

Breastfeeding by then was going pretty well minus me running out of milk randomly and having to supplement. She was nursing for hours on end and it shows at her appointment she had already put on a full pound. After not even a week of being home. I tried a lot of things to get my supply going, but my favorite thing was just spending those first couple of days skin to skin nursing even when I wasn’t making enough milk. The thing that’s helped most was the mother’s milk tea I drank it one night and woke up with enough milk to feed the entire neighborhood it felt like. It’s made a huge difference for me if you have problems with your supply like I did I highly recommend doing both. It’s only been a few days and man has it made a difference not to mention she now flat out refuses formula.

Play and everything has been pretty simple. I’m still reading to Beatrice and giving her tummy time usually on my chest which she likes for the most part. Unless I try to sit her on the floor. It’s made a difference for sure. She can already lift her head for a short time and looks from me to her dad when I hold her on my shoulder. I give her little leg and feet massages every day and she likes touching different fabrics like a teddy bear or the velcro on my boppy.

When nothing else calms her her dad puts on heavy metal and she calms down and falls asleep. Oh and she has a belly button now her cord fell off today it’s absolutely adorable.


Beatrice’s Birth and way too long hospital stays

I became a mom on September 7th 2015 to the most beautiful 7 pound four once, 21 inch long little baby girl. I’d felt contractions since Saturday. but didn’t want to go in too soon since I’d already been to labor and delivery for two false alarms  I went in Wednesday night when the pain was getting really bad and what I’d thought was heavy watery discharge that had been leaking all day turned out to be my water.

Everything started out well enough. I was dilating and things looked good my doctor decided to give me pitocin just to be safe since my water had broken and it had already been six hours. I went from 5cm to 9 cm within twenty minutes. I had an epidural, but was still in immense pain. Next thing I knew it was time to push and since Brandon had stayed with me all night he had gone home to take a quick nap and eat something when we both thought I’d had at least five or so more hours. No such luck he missed the whole thing.I don’t really blame him because I told him to go and rest so he would have energy for the main event, but it did disappoint me. I really wanted him there I wish one of us could of seen her birth since I ended up being knocked out for it.

I started pushing around ten or eleven in the morning, but was making no progress no matter how hard I tried. The doctor said she thought I just wasn’t putting in enough effort, but I gave it my all. She tried using the vacuum several times more than she said she was suppose to I’d been pushing for two hours at that point and my epidural had worn off completely. I ended up needing a c section after Beatrice’s heart rate kept dropping and wasn’t allowed to see her at all after she was born. I finally saw her a day or so later when a nurse wheeled me to the NICU. A nurse was nice enough to take pictures for me, but I really really regret that I didn’t get to do skin to skin or breast feed right after she was born. It was really the one thing I’d planned on doing, but like everything else that day it just wasn’t happening like it was suppose to. She stayed in the nursery all week until yesterday when we were finally allowed to room in. She had a lot of breathing, digestive, and other problems from being in the birth canal for too long, but seems to be doing perfectly fine now. I love just looking at her face and holding her. It’s made all the pain worth it.

With that said I have to say it was a traumatic experience and I don’t see myself having any more children. The idea of childbirth always seemed a bit scary to me, but that was a nightmare.

That’s okay though because I have the most amazing little girl and I don’t need any other kids.

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It’s my due date

And though a lot has happened our baby being born was not one of those things. I was almost positive I’d have her either over the weekend or on Monday when I thought my water broke at work. We went to Labor and Delivery and they did a quick test before sending us home it turns out it was just pee. It was pretty embarrassing really my boss paraded me around work and told everyone I was having my baby even though I wasn’t totally sold on it myself. I’d had a lot of what felt like contractions over the weekend, but they’d died down completely by Monday. The only thing that had me worried was there was a gush of fluid when I stood up at one point. I called Labor and Delivery figuring they’d tell me to put on a pad and wait it out or something, but instead they told me to come in immediately. Otherwise I would of kept working for the rest of my shift and maybe went if I had any more leakage.

Since the nurse made it sound like a really serious thing I panicked and told my boss I was going to get checked out. Everyone I work with was so sure it was going to be the day, but no such luck I was back at work today doing the same old same old.

I learned today apparently the people I work with really don’t like left overs. We had a special food day with smoked sausage, green beans, and potatoes that were absolutely delicious earlier this week and still had a ton left so that’s what I had for lunch. Everyone in the break room was telling me they don’t like to eat anything that isn’t fresh with few exceptions. I couldn’t imagine a life without leftovers. They save so much time and depending on what they are sometimes are even better the next day. I just thought that was really bizarre.